Verdict.
Not good.
January 28, 2009
January 25, 2009
Review: Tropic Thunder
I do believe this movie should have been called three amigos two, but not near as good.
Don’t get me wrong, I did laugh and more or less enjoyed this movie, but I was not invested enough to care. I could care less about Jack Blacks addiction, or the fact that Stiller went “Full Retard.” As I did not find myself entertained with these side stories, I did thoroughly enjoy Robert Downey Jr , Tom Cruise and Mathew McCantspellhislastname. Cruise as the overweight, balding, business first producer dropping f-bombs as if someone made fun of scientology . Downey Jr as the excessive method actor, who plays an African American who gets in little verbal battles with the Alpa Chino who is actually black. Matthew who played Stillers agent who goes to hell and back to get Stiller his Tivo. These performances were well worth the rental fee.
January 6, 2009
Review. Love Actually
So my new years resolution was to not only keep track of every movie that I watched, but also to give them a mild review. So I can only assume that god must hate me based on the first movie that I watched this year. Love Actually.
Before I get started, I must say that it was not my idea. I did not wake up and say, “I would love to see a really cheesy romantic comedy staring Hugh Grant.” This did not happen. The way I remember it, I was in a condo in Idaho with fifteen of my lady friend, friends, when I climbed my hung over ass off the air mattress and made my way downstairs. As I fell upon the closest unoccupied chair grappling with the pounding in my head I realized that I heard something that did not sound right at all. What is this horrible screeching sound, I thought. I looked up and saw Hugh Grant smirking at me. Shit.
So I sat there and watched this whole movie. Here are the problems I have with this movie, in no particular order.
1) A couple falls in love without ever actually having a conversation. Literally. They speak different languages. Through the use of subtitles, we know they are talking about the same thing, but they don’t.
2) An aging rocker not only decides to spend Christmas with his fat manager over nasty groupies, but he has the number one Christmas song on Christmas, which I did not even know was a category that anyone gave a damn about.
3) The Prime Minister is Hugh Grant.
4) Every American is portrayed as either a dumb womanizer with a holier than though attitude, or a whore. The exception to this is the fourth grade girl who sings a song at the end of the movie, which incidentally is the first time you meet her, and besides the song has like two lines, so naturally you don’t really care about her.
5) The kid who is in “love” with the above mentioned girl, learns to play the drum in the span of a few weeks. I have tooled around on the drums a bit from time to time, and its not that easy. This kid not only learns to play them, but also gets to play backup for the girl during the Christmas talent show.
6) Who has a school functioned talent show on Christmas!?
7) A best friend not only hits on his friends wife, but does it in a blatant rip off of Bob Dylan’s subterranean homesick blues that it literally makes me want to punch the director in the face and punch the guy in the face because its wrong to hit on a friends wife. There are rules. Even if you know these two are better together than the current situation, you don’t go all out and pull out a Dylanesque maneuver to tell her how much you like her. What would have happened if HE would have answered the door!
8) Who brings a damn sax to a wedding!?
9) Did I mention Hugh Grant is the Prime Minister?
Ok, so now that I have trashed this movie to complete oblivion I will say that it was indeed bad. Would I buy it? Absolutely not. I would how ever spend another new years in a hung over transitional state watching this movie if the remote control was on the coffee table two feet out of my reach and this was on.
Reviewed on 01.01.09